Lazer Kiwi is a custom blend of Lazer Beanz and Kiwi Jealousy, gently decarbed, then loaded into a two gram cured Pocket Puffer, or one gram Gem Cart.
Type: Sativa
Availability: 2g Cured Pocket Puffer, and 1g Gem Carts.
Lazer Kiwi Cart PhytoFact Sheet
The Tastes: On the inhale, expect bright citrus, dry pepper, and a little tart fruit sweetness tucked underneath. The middle gets more grounded, moving into earthy spice, light wood, and a faint green-herbal edge. The exhale finishes dry, peppery, slightly bitter, and lightly fruity, with more citrus peel and kiwi skin than juicy tropical candy.
This is Lazer Beanz meeting Kiwi Jealousy, so naturally the name sounds like something a cartoon villain would use to ruin a farmer’s market. The actual profile is much more restrained than that, thank whatever minor deity watches over terpene charts.
Let’s see what the numbers say.
Beta-caryophyllene leads at 3.39%, and that is the main structure of this cart. Expect a strong peppery backbone with dry wood and resinous spice underneath. This is the terpene keeping Lazer Kiwi from becoming a sweet green fruit gimmick with no load-bearing walls.
Alpha-humulene comes in at 1.38%, reinforcing the dry, earthy, slightly bitter side of the profile. Together, caryophyllene and humulene make this feel more grounded than the sativa label alone might suggest. There’s a lot of spice and structure here before the fruit gets much room to talk.
Limonene at 0.75% brings the bright citrus top note. It shows up more like citrus peel than lemonade, giving the inhale some lift and helping the kiwi side feel sharper and more tart.
Myrcene at 0.48% adds a little body and soft herbal depth, while linalool at 0.24% smooths the edges with a faint floral sweetness. Fenchol at 0.17%, alpha-pinene at 0.14%, alpha-terpineol at 0.11%, and beta-pinene at 0.08% fill in the background with light green, herbal, and fresh notes. Terpinolene is low at 0.07%, so this isn’t a loud, sparkling, tropical sativa. It’s more dry citrus, pepper, and green fruit edge.
The Feels: Lazer Kiwi lands as a grounded sativa with a clear but comfortable lane. The limonene gives the onset some brightness, while the small pinene and terpinolene numbers add a little clarity and movement. That said, this one is not built like a racy, high-wire sativa. The caryophyllene and humulene are too dominant for that.
Instead, expect something more steady and functional, with comfort and calm underneath the lift. The myrcene and linalool add just enough softness to keep the experience from feeling sharp, while the low-to-moderate supporting terps keep it from sliding too far into sleepy territory.
Overall, with 76% total active cannabinoids and 7.69% terpene content, Lazer Kiwi by The Dope Depot is a dry, citrus-pepper sativa with a tart green fruit edge and a strong earthy backbone.
The terpene profile is built around caryophyllene, humulene, limonene, myrcene, and linalool. That gives it peppery structure, dry earth, citrus lift, mild body, and a softer floral finish.
From a formulation standpoint, this works because Lazer Beanz brings the peppery, citrus-heavy structure, while Kiwi Jealousy adds a brighter tart-fruit angle without taking over. It’s not candy kiwi. It’s more like citrus peel, dry spice, green fruit skin, and earthy resin, which is far more useful than the name has any right to be.
Rating: Our lab rats give Lazer Kiwi 8.2 pieces of cheese.
Find The Dope Depot Lazer Kiwi carts at these fine Oregon shops.
- Coming Soon!
- Coming Soon!
- Coming Soon!
If these shops don’t have what you need, tell them it’s time to reup!